A Taste of Xmas, Sedaris-Style

So I've been a bad blogger...it's no secret. Sorry!!! I started a new job and my laptop is shot, but now that things have calmed down and I have a sexy macbook air, I'm gonna try to get back to wandering and sharing my stories. However, I'm about to leave the city for a week so I won't have anything to blog about...so I thought I'd share that David Sedaris Christmas/Santa Rant that I mentioned in my last post. It's a hilarious tidbit about the different Santa stories from different cultures...try to make it to the end, that's the best part. Enjoy! And have great holidays!!!!! :)

Excerpt from David Sedaris’ Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim from the chapter Six to Eight Black Men:

It's about the questions he asks when he is traveling to learn about the people and the culture...

"When do you open your Christmas presents?” is another good conversation starter, as I think it explains a lot about national character.  People who traditionally open gifts on Christmas Eve seem a bit more pious and family-orientated than those who wait until Christmas morning. They go to Mass, open presents, eat a late meal, return to church the following morning, and devote the rest of the day to eating another big meal. Gifts are generally reserved for children, and the parents tend not to go overboard. It’s nothing I’d want for myself, but I suppose it’s fine for those who prefer food and family to things of real value. 

In France and Germany gifts are exchanged on Christmas Eve, while in the Netherlands the children open their presents on December 5, in celebration of St. Nicholas Day. It sounded sort of quaint until I spoke to a man named Oscar, who filled me in on a few of the details as we walked form my hotel to the Amsterdam train station.

Unlike the jolly, obese American Santa, Saint Nicholas is painfully thin and dresses not unlike the pope, topping his robes with a tall hat resembling an embroidered tea cozy. The outfit, I was told, is a carryover from his former career, when he served as the bishop of Turkey.

One doesn’t want to be too much of a cultural chauvinist, but this seemed completely wrong to me. For starters, Santa didn’t used to do anything.  He’s not retired and, more important, he ahs nothing to do with Turkey.  It’s too dangerous there, and the people wouldn’t appreciate him.  When asked how he got from Turkey to the North Pole, Oscar told me with complete conviction that Saint Nicholas currently resides in Spain, which again is simply not true.  Though he could probably live wherever he wanted, Santa chose the North Pole specifically because it is harsh and isolated.  No one can spy on him, and he doesn’t have to worry bout people coming to the door.  Anyone can come to the door in Spain, and in that outfit he’d most certainly be recognized.  On top of that, aside from a few pleasantries, Santa doesn’t speak Spanish.  “Hello. How are you? Can I get you some candy?” Fine.  He knows enough to get by, but he’s not fluent and he certainly doesn’t eat tapas.  

While our Santa flies in on a sled, the Dutch version arrives by boat and then transfers to a white horse.  The event is televised, and great crowds gather at the waterfront to greet him.  I’m not sure if there’s a set date, but he generally docks in late November and spends a few weeks hanging out and asking people what they want.  

“Is it just him alone?” I asked. “Or does he come with some backup?”

Oscar’s English was close to perfect, but he seemed thrown by a term normally reserved for police reinforcement.  Helpers,” I said.  “Does he have any elves?” Maybe I’m overly sensitive, but I couldn’t help but feel personally insulted when Oscar denounced the very idea as grotesque and unrealistic.  “Elves,” he said. “They are just so silly.”

The words silly and unrealistic were redefined when I learned that Saint Nicholas travels with what was consistently described as “six to eight black men.”  I asked several Dutch people to narrow it down, but none of them could give me an exact number.  It was always “six to eight,” which seems strange, seeing as they’ve had hundreds of years to get an accurate head count.  

The six to eight black men were characterized as personal slaves until the mid-1950s, when the political climate changed and it was decided that instead of being slaves they were just good friends.  I think history has proved that something usually comes between slavery and friendship, a period of time marked not by cookies and quiet hours beside the fire but by bloodshed and mutual hostility.  They have such violence in the Netherlands, but rather than duking it out amongst themselves, Santa and his former slaves decided to take it out on the public.  In the early years if a child was naughty, Saint Nicholas and the six to eight black men would beat him with what Oscar described as “the small branch of a tree, or a ‘switch’.” … “They’d kick him and beat him with a switch.  Then if the youngster was really bad, they’d put him in a sack and take him back to Spain.”

“Saint Nicholas would kick you?”

“Well, not anymore,” Oscar said.  “Now he just pretends to kick you.”

…What kind of a Santa spends his time pretending to kick people before stuffing them into a canvas sack? Then, of course, you’ve got the six to eight former slaves who could potentially go off at any moment.  This, I think, is the greatest difference between us and the Dutch.  While a certain segment of our population might be perfectly happy with the arrangement, if you told the average white American that six to eight nameless black men would be sneaking into his house in the middle of the night, he would barricade the doors and arm himself with whatever he could get his hands on. 

….

While eight flying reindeer are a hard pill to swallow, our Christmas story remains relatively dull.  Santa lives with his wife in a remote polar village and spends one night a year traveling around the world. If you’re bad, he leaves you coal.  If you’re good and live in America, he’ll give you just about anything you want.  We tell our children to be good and send them off to bed, where they lie awake, anticipating their great bounty.  A Dutch parent has a decidedly hairier story to relate, telling his children, “Listen, you might want to pack a few of your things together before going to bed.  The former bishop of Turkey will be coming tonight along with six to eight black men.  They might put some candy in your stockings, they might stuff you into a sack and take you to Spain, or they might just pretend to kick you.  We don’t know for sure, but we want you to be prepared.’ 

A melancholy coin purse...David Sedaris reading and signing at B&N

The great thing about this blog is that it’s really put me in an up-for-whatever mindset when it comes to NYC—it hasn’t just forced me to plan to do something cool every week or so, it's affected my whole outlook. So when my cousin mentioned that one of our favorite authors, David Sedaris, would be reading from his new book at the Union Square Barnes & Noble, my response was an obvious Let's Go! A few months ago, even without work in the morning and in even in warmer temperatures, I might have been lazier and less willing, but this week, it was a no-brainer.

For those of you who don’t know any of Sedaris’ work, he is HILARIOUS. Most of his books are full of anecdotes from his life, all recounted in the wittiest, most sarcastic, self-deprecating, amazing writing. I have to confess I have only read two of his books thus far, but there has never been a dull moment in either one (and I have one holiday-themed book on deck for December + I’ve just purchased his new book, Squirrel Seeks Chipmunk, to start ASAP). I sort of have reading ADD, I think right now I’m in the middle of four books. Woops! I like to keep it interesting :)

Anyway, my first Sedaris book was, I think his most well-known, Me Talk Pretty One Day. It is a hilarious recounting of two major parts of his life, one being his childhood, which is particularly relevant to me because he grew up in Raleigh (near Duke) and his dad’s side of the family is Greek (like mine!). But it’s not just the personal relevance that makes it great, it’s the stories. Everyone has a bit of a wacky family, probably not nearly as crazy as Sedaris’, but you’ll love reading stories about cooky family members with weird habits and personalities. In my favorite (slash preference of the two), Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim, I literally laughed out loud the whole time. Just wait for Christmastime--I’ve already planned to transcribe my favorite passage from the book (about Santa Claus). But to give you an idea, I’ll try to find something indicative of his writing style and subject matter that I can type up right now. Seriously, I recommend his books: easy, entertaining reads that will make you laugh out loud.

Excerpt: So this is a piece from Me Talk Pretty One Day and it is one of those relevant-to-me stories, but I suspect that a lot of my friends are familiar with the customs described as well, so I figured I’d go for it.

“As Greeks, we had our own Easter, which was usually observed anywhere form two to four weeks after what was known in our circle as “the American version.” The reason has to do with the moon or the Orthodox calendar—something mysterious like that—though our mother always suspected it was scheduled at a later date so that the Greeks could buy their marshmallow chicks and plastic grass at drastically reduced sale prices. “The cheap sons of bitches,” she’d say. “If they had their way, we’d be celebrating Christmas in the middle of goddamn February.” …

“In the evening we had the traditional Greek meal followed by a game in which we would toast one another with blood-colored eggs. The symbolism escapes me, but the holder of the table’s one uncracked egg was supposedly rewarded with a year of good luck. I won only once. It was the year my mother died, my apartment got broken into, and I was taken to the emergency room suffering from what the attending physician diagnosed as “house-wife’s knee.””

I promise the books do nottt focus on him being Greek, he’s not even REALLY Greek…I just happened to have this passage underlined and it was easy to find and is funny (I think so anyway!). Trust me, I didn’t note any other Greeks in the massive crowd on Monday. I’m telling you. He rocks. But anyway, that’s the end of me plugging Sedaris.

The point of this post is to tell you about the reading and let you know about other great events going on at Barnes and Noble. We clearly underestimated Sedaris’ popularity, to say the least. We got there 15 minutes early, thinking we even had time to look around the store, but once we got the fourth floor, where the reading was, it was a major shock. The entire floor was PACKED. They had set up maybe 250 chairs, which were completely full, and the back half of the store consisted of crowds of people standing in between bookshelves…we were mushed in there. Of course it doesn’t really matter how close you are since you are just listening, but I would recommend getting there an hour early if you even want to consider a chair, but still no guarantees. The reading was great, hilarious of course. Sedaris read a bit from his new book, then shared some funny notes from his personal diary and answered some questions, all for about 45 minutes. Afterwards we got on line to get our books signed and have a minute with the great author. Unfortunately, even though he apparently signed for an hour and a half before the reading, there were still at least a hundred people waiting afterwards. And after almost two hours of waiting, we finally bailed. We figured it would have been about another hour and hunger pains were kicking in. So again, if getting your book signed by the author is really important to you…go early! 

There are some cool author and artist events going on in the next few months at various B&Ns around the city. I'll list some of them that I thought would be interesting/fun, there’s really something for everyone… 

- For the more politically inclined: The author of Game Change, a NYT bestseller on the 2008 presidential election will discuss his book and The author of the Bill Clinton biography A Complicated Man, will discuss his book (both this Friday!!)

- For sports fans: Sportscaster and former Giants kicker Pat Summerall will discuss his book about the Giants and coaches Vince Lombardi and Tom Landry

- For the musicians out there: Various musical events (like jazz, broadway songs, or tributes to certain artists—Beatles this Thurs!), with CD signing, and some actual dance performances (ballet in barnes and noble? I mean I’d like to see that…)

- For the jokesters: Steve Martin will be here later this month to discuss his recent fiction book (who knew he was an author??)

- For the pop-culture obsessed: The Kardashian sisters (Nov 30) will be discussing I guess themselves and their book…about themselves. Sounds awesome!!

There’s just so much variety…and it’s free! Definitely check out this link to see more.  You can search by store or author/artist or type of event—very user-friendly. This is just another really great, different, entertaining thing to do in this awesome city. Take advantage of it!! 

Happy Sedaris Reading!!

- The Wandering New Yorker

An "Intellect-Tickling" Day at the New Museum

Finally…a real post! And a museum post! Woohoo! Actually don’t get too excited, this is probably going to be one of the few museum visits for me, at least art museums. I’m confident enough in my general intelligence to admit that I’m not really intellectual enough for contemporary and modern art. Science museums though, I’m all over that. (There is a seriously cool exhibit coming up at the AMNH this month that you will SURELY hear about) But anyway, I still enjoy the ~25% of art museums that I understand. And I was really interested in checking out the New Museum after I got a Groupon email about it. I was initially drawn to the picture of the museum’s exterior--it’s a really great piece of art in itself: a stack of different sized boxes shifted around a central axis. It’s like a modern leaning tower of Pisa! Sort of. So I went on to read the description, which said the museum "showcases intellect-tickling contemporary art from adventurous artists," and I though...Alright, I'm down with some tickling of the intellect on a Sunday afternoon.

The museum is down in the Bowery and very easy to pick out on a street with few modern buildings. As I said, a lot of the pieces were over my head, but the ones I did understand, I was totally into. So I’m going to recap what was most memorable of what my feeble engineering mind could grasp.

The ground floor has a fun little exhibit called “Voice and Wind” and is referred to as a “meditative installation”, where the artist uses venetian blinds and scent atomizers that hang from the ceiling as “sensorial stimuli infusing the installation with subtle tactile and olfactory experiences that call upon the visitor’s subjectivity as a key element in the meaning of the work.” << Kinda heavy right? Well to me it was a fun colorful maze where you can walk up to the fan devices and guess the scents coming from each one, lots of earthy aromas. Ask the guard what they are when you’re done to see how you do! We got most of ‘em :) It was fun. Interactive is ALWAYS fun. I’m not so sure what I learned though…

The exhibit I was most excited for was “Free”, which is built upon the idea of free culture, “a social movement that acknowledges the revolution the internet has caused in industries like music and print publishing, and argues that it be dealt with as an opportunity for creating, sharing and distribution of knowledge, rather than a threat.” So the artists are all exploring how people and society have changed with the expansion of the public space and how they’ve adjusted to a world where information is so easily accessible. As I’ve been looking into digital media and marketing as a career path, I’ve been learning a lot about how growth in the digital space has really affected the way the whole world works. (I’m currently reading Googled, the story of google…and it really puts the massive disruptive effect of their creations into perspective. Very cool story if you’ve got the time, but warning: there is a lot of detail in there.) So since this has been at the forefront of my intellectual and professional curiosity recently, I was pumped.

I’ll talk about my favorite piece: 19:30. I really LOVED this display, by a Yugoslavian woman who wanted to show how (and this is in the simplest terms, must check it out for the full effect), prior to the expansion of the internet into the country--which happened to occur simultaneously with the collapse of socialism--the 8:30pm (or 19:30) news was considered a “unifying social norm,” since the whole country would sit down to view the broadcast. But as the country fell apart and internet access allowed people to get their news at any time, this unifying event disappeared. Then in the ‘90s, electronic dance music came into popularity and young people would gather in these huge groups to basically get down and rave. The message of the piece is that: when information can be accessed at any time, the nightly news loses its power to unite a large group, but a live event like a rave, can still bring large groups together. To show this, the artist has a projection of two parallel screens, the left showing news broadcasts and the right showing videos of Yugoslavians dancing and raving, with perfectly coordinated typical “news music” combined with techno-electronica music in the background. I recorded a short clip of the action to give you an idea (and introduce some video into the blog), but it really does not do the display justice. I came back twice to listen to techno and watch the globes rotating and news broadcasters at the same time as crazy raving with smoke and lasers. The music really fit perfectly and I thought the message was pretty cool. Access to the internet completely changed routine.

The main exhibit right now, which takes up 3 floors of the museum, is the “Last Newspaper” which explores the "ways artists approach the news and respond to the stories and images that command the headlines." This is a pretty broad concept so there were a lot of different types of pieces in the exhibit.

One of the more memorable pieces, “Eulogies to One and Another” compares the news coverage of two coworkers involved in a car bombing in Iraq. An American woman and Iraqi man who worked with a non-profit in Iraq, both died in the car bombing, but received very different levels of remembrance in the press. These two pictures show the same news articles, the first set of frames highlights all of the news surrounding the deaths, but the second set highlights only the statements about to the Iraqi man killed in the bombing. You can see that the frames are almost empty in this set. Pretty sad. I mean there is something to say about the fact that American and UK news sources would be more interested in the death of an American than an Iraqi, but the difference in degree of mention of the American and Iraqi in all of the news articles is pretty drastic. It was just kind of a “wow” moment. Click the pics to enlarge and get a better idea.  

Also there was a particularly disturbing display, of which you will not get the full effect if you don’t read the description. On first glance you see about 8 newspaper covers with pictures of Saddam Hussein with statements that chronicle his downfall, all covered with splatters of glitter. So I’m thinking ok…this is some sort of “I hate Sadaam” display…covering his face with paint, that happens to have glitter in it? As I was standing there eyeing the papers, searching deep inside my head for something really intellectual, my museum buddy goes “OH GROSS” and tells me I have to read the description. It’s jizz, people. Yea, semen. The artist has ejaculated onto the newspapers and then sprinkled them with glitter to show his "response to the hysterical headlines and comment on the brutally transient nature of celebrity." ...I don't know what to say...way to really stick it to Saddam, buddy...?

So if all of the intellectual art has drained you, once you're done you can kick up your blood-sugar levels with a delicious Birdbath by City Bakery chocolate chip cookie and a coffee! Everyone knows it’s tiring to walk around a museum all day, so a cookie and a coffee and a little bit of rest for your feet is a perfect end to a great day. That cookie was clutch. (Somehow even when the post/activity has nothing to do with food I manage to find a way to bring it in haha…)

There is SO much in this museum that I didn’t even begin to touch on. Check the “Pics from my Trips” on the sidebar to the right to see some more pictures from my visit. And I definitely recommend the New Museum if you want an intellectual afternoon complete with some eye-opening moments (and a cookie on top).


- The Wandering New Yorker

Halloween pictures to to distract you from my negligence!

I have to seriously apologize for my lack in posts in the last 10 days. As they say, finding a job is a full time job, and when you throw Halloween preparations into the picture, the days get so full it's hard to find time to sit and concentrate on a post. So...yea it's still not ready (it's coming!) but I thought I would distract/entertain you with some pictures of my Halloween arts and crafts creations...Enjoy :)

^^ I carved this baby free hand (which you can prob tell from the asymmetry). Isn't it scary? You can find it on a third floor fire escape on 2nd ave between 34th and 35th street (if it hasn't been tossed yet).

Down here is my Halloween costume. Sandy is Uncle Pennybags (aka the Monopoly Guy) in jail and I'm the Community Chest GET OUT OF JAIL FREE card. Aren't we cute? :D I'm really into home-made costumes and also being inanimate objects (last year I was a Duff Beer and Sandy was Duff-Man -- ilovethesimpsons). Click the pics to see my masterpieces in more detail.

Here's what went into these badboys:

1. Trip to target to purchase everything they have in mustard yellow (turns out they have a lot, I was deciding between a nice little cardigan and this tee shirt)

2. Mixing fingerpaint colors to get mustard yellow. (For some reason I thought I would get mustard by mixing yellow and green. That was a mistake and took a lot of yellow to correct!)

3. Cutting out poster board and paint with a sponge because I had no paintbrush.

4. Spending several hours copying a community chest card and in jail space onto giant sized posterboard. Yep I drew that all freehand slash with a ruler. Not super easy, esp since I'm no artist haha. My roommate can attest to the fact that it involved a lot of erasing pencil lines until it was acceptable. Also she colored in the black on the community chest and the orange on the 'in jail' piece to give me a break. Thanks Er!

5. Finishing touches like fastening and wearing monopoly pieces as jewelry :) Oh and this heinous color on my fingernails...I have to remember to take this off ASAP. 

6. Sandy spending 15 mins in Rickys to get a prisoner jumpsuit, hat and 'stache (that lasted about 10 mins and was ripped off shortly after this photo).   

7. Special thanks to my grandma for lending me one of her canes for Uncle Pennybags :) Good thing she has like ten of them...

Anyway, hope that was entertaining enough to redeem myself for being negligent to the blog. I promise the New Museum post will come soon, hopefully before they change the exhibits!! 

Hope everyone had a great Halloween!!!! I did!

BOO

- The Wandering New Yorker 

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This blog officially has a mind of its own! I've made a twitter page dedicated solely to the life of the Wandering New Yorker (not alex P).

Find it here: @WanderingNYer. 

Don't be thrown off by the new color scheme, I'm experimenting with some new looks, still trying to find my identity.

Check the new twitter page for live updates on where I'm exploring to get a taste of what's to come, and of course, to find out when new posts are published.

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Enjoy!

No cuts no buts no coconuts! Long Lines and Good Food at the Grub Street Food Fest

So this isn’t really a full on post, more like a recap of some of the flavors of the day last Saturday. We did get some yummy tastes in, but I really wish someone had told me that places would already be out of food and shut down by 2pm. It would have been wise to get there around noon…not that I think I would have been able to get up much earlier…Friday night was a late one! :D

So first of all, that place was crazaaaaay! I mean did it really have to be packed into that little space? There were so many people it was almost impossible to move forward...or sideways...or backward without getting aggressive. It was really difficult to maneuver and get to the tables you wanted to be at, partially b/c some hotspots, obviously Luke's included, had long lines that spanned 3+ stations. These places were the ones that were worth it though, and there was at least a fun sense of camaraderie with the other people who were waiting on line with you…you would all chuckle together when some naïve newcomer would ask to get by so they could get to the table, to which you responded, with a smile, “Haha no sorry. The end of the line is actually wayyyy back there.” And then turn to the person behind you and say, “Sucks for them!” *chuckle chuckle chuckle*

We wanted to hit Luke’s first to ensure we had something delicious to start. The line was ridiccccculous, but luckily the team was moving pretty quickly and on the way was one of the spots I wanted to hit anyway: Cascabel. One chicken taco please. Mmm! So good. I’m usually not a fan of soft-shell tacos--I know I know, the real way is soft shells, but I really like to get some crunch in all my foods…I am a major proponent of potato chips in sandwiches, try it. SO good. (Also, you know that scene in Breakfast Club when the weird girl makes a sandwich out of bread, some cereal (possibly Cap’n Crunch) and sugar, and then bites into it and it makes this huge *crunch* sound? Yea I think I might be the only person who thought that looked REALLY appealing.) Anyway, even though I like a little crunch in my taco, these babies were really good, especially with some hot diablo sauce. In fact, before we left we stopped by again for some pork tacos…these were even better than the chicken. As we discussed in the moment, isn’t pork ALWAYS better than chicken? Yes. Which was followed up with, well unless it is really fatty or dry. (So no, not really, but also yes.)

Back to Luke’s…I decided it was finally time to try the crab roll. Oh. Em. Gee. It was really freakin’ good. I know the lobster roll is supposed to be the highlight, but the crab roll is really SO good. I definitely recommend it. I have totally been converted. Not sure I’ll ever go back. Just look at this picture--seriously, you want to click and zoom in on this thing. Look at it. Ahhhhhhhh. I just want it all the time! 

Anyway, so maybe it was not a wise choice to wait on the Luke’s line first because by the time we were done there, a lot of places were closing down! It was so depressing. Georgia’s Eastside BBQ looked like it had been closed for a while…and just as we were walking up to La Sonrisa they were taking down the sign. So we abandoned empanadas (I know…it’s really really sad…I must have said “I really wanted an empanada” and frowned like 6 times before I just accepted it) So we decided we would get on the really-slowly-moving line for a Pies ‘n Thighs chicken biscuit to round out the afternoon and leave happy. When we were about 8 people from the stand, the unthinkable happens…THIS:

They are OUT of chicken biscuits. Nooooooooooooooo. After deliberating whether to get off the line or wait to try to biscuits with cream cheese and hot pepper jelly, we decided to stay…except hot pepper jelly does not appeal to me so I just had store bought cream cheese on a cold, soggy biscuit. Disappointing. (This is when the second taco stop happened). I guess I’m just gonna have to trek down to Brooklyn to get the full Pies ‘N Thighs experience. And don’t worry, I’ll tell you alllll about it when I do.

I hope some of you were able to get out to the Food Festival, hopefully earlier than me, and try some goodies. The spots I missed are now on my list of places to go and hopefully I will get my empanada, chicken biscuit, bbq, and blondie soon enough.  

- The Wandering New Yorker

Grub Street Food Festival This Saturday!

Another great event is going down tomorrow (Saturday) and trust me, you don't wanna miss it!

NY Mag's Grub Street is partnering up with the Hester Street Fair to put together a giant food fest with some delicious vendors. Grub Street has put together a list of their favorite food vendors to come together for this street festival, so you know it's gonna be amazing. And guess who's gonna be there? Our favorite: Luke's Lobster!!

Booths I'm dying to try (after I get my lobster roll):

- Georgia's Eastside BBQ - I just don't eat enough pulled pork anymore

- Pies 'n Thighs - mm fried chicken...AND pie? Dunno if I'll be able to handle both...

- Cascabel / La Sonrisa - I just can't decide! I can never say no to tacos OR empanadas. ayyyy

- Hot Blondies - gotta have dessert :) How good do THESE look???

Of course I'm not sure I can handle all that food in one afternoon (it's not completely impossible), butttt I'm hoping to bring along some backup to help me sample as many flavors as possible (now taking volunteers!). And if I see something that looks too appealing to pass up, I'll have to divert my focus. Gotta give everyone a fair chance at getting some Mmms and Ooos. Ah I can't wait!!! I will definitely be hitting the gym today in preparation for tomorrow's events...gotta keep up my strength ya know? 

For a full list of vendors Click Here (nymag) or Here (hester st). Let me know if you see one that I just HAVE to try. Also check out Grub Street's recommendations of what to taste at each vendor Here. I am seriously salivating now. Beware hungry readers...

Here are the Deets:
Saturday October 16th (one day only!!)
10am-6pm
@ the intersection of Hector and Essex, Lower East Side

Hope to see you there!!!


- The Wandering New Yorker

Triple Sweet Afternoon at The Chelsea Market

Ladies and gentlemen…I have found my heaven. It involves, surprise surprise, lots and lots of food. I can’t believe I didn’t know about the Chelsea Market until now. This place is amazing--and I only touched on a few of the vendors. Who knows what other deliciousness is waiting for me there?? You can be sure that this isn’t the last you’ll be hearing about it on this blog.

Chelsea spans roughly from
14th-34th, bet the Hudson and
5th ave/Bdwy; Sandwiched between
Hell's Kitchen & West Village
(click to enlarge)

The Chelsea Market is located in West Chelsea, between 9^th and 10^th avenues, spanning 15^th to 16^th street, in what used to be a part of the National Biscuit Company complex, built in the 1890s. Apparently they made some of our favorite snacks there, including Oreos, Fig Newtons, Mallomars, Barnum’s Animal Crackers, and Saltines. In 1959, National Buscuit’s main production site was in New Jersey (lame) so they sold their buildings at this site, and they changed hands until sometime in the 1990s when the ground floor was turned into the windy road of food stores and eateries that it is today. There are some really cool elements from the original building, including this faux waterfall that attracts lots of kids, coins and me. There’s more cool historical tidbits about the location on the Chelsea Market site, click here. 

First impressions: Walking into this place was just so exciting. It was booming with noise and other eager eaters, it was seasonally decorated with tons of fun Halloween paraphernalia (I LOVE Halloween decorations). Ignoring the Anthropologie store right near the 9^th ave entrance, you walk into this cool, underground warehouse type vibe and are surrounded by a huge variety of sweet shops, markets, restaurants and more. Like I said…heaven. Basically, after this trip I made two immediate decisions: 1) On my “Important things to consider when looking for new apartment” List, I have added “Proximity to Chelsea Market” 2) I now need to start a “Important things to consider when looking for new apartment” List…so I can make sure to add stuff like this, and of course "Close to a wine store," but that’s sort of assumed. It's basically on par with functioning shower and sink. You know...the basics.

MmmmmNOPE.

So anyway, here’s how my trip to heaven came to be…I was initially drawn to the market by a Time Out NY review of the RonnyBrook Milk Bar. Let me tell you, they made this place sound great…pointing out a fab deal of $3.50 for two “freshly baked cookies” and a glass of milk. They’ve got flavored milk, milkshakes, ice cream, cookies, the works. It was really promising! So of course I asked to try this great deal, with some cold skim milk, a chocolate chip cookie and a white choc chip cookie. Doesn’t that look really good?

Well it’s not. It’s hard to say what the most disappointing part of the Milk Bar experience was because everything honestly just missed the mark. The first sign of disaster was that the milk was room temperature. Now I am super weird about milk…I need it to be really really cold, so I almost always drink it on ice. And I recognize that this is not normal. But even my normal milk-temperature-drinking companion was pretty grossed out. Needless to say, we requested a cup of ice. I’m not sure how a milk bar can get this wrong, but they definitely did. Next sign: the cookies were legitimately ice cold. When the employee told me she’d have to go into the back to get more choc chip cookies, I was hoping that meant there were some coming out of the oven, but I’m pretty sure she got it from the refridgerator. Ugh. So disappointing! So we asked if she could zap them in the microwave. She was incredibly friendly and helpful, I'll give them that, but it gets worse. The cookies had an interesting smoky taste to them--do you like smoky cookies? No. Because smokiness is not a cookie characteristic. This means they are burned. In addition to the light charring on the bottom, they seemed to be sprinkled with leftover chips of tin foil. UGH. You're not supposed to feed people tin foil. It's not like we didn't still eat the cookies...I mean they werrrre cookies after all, but it just wasn't anywhere near what we thought we'd be getting.  Maybe my experience was an anomaly and it was just because it was late-ish in the day and we got a bad batch of cookies or something, but I'm not really willing to try it again. Booooo milk bar.

Moving Forward...I was actually not planning on sampling multiple stations in the Chelsea Market, but after that disappointing first taste, I felt like I needed something else, and then having only two flavors to talk about just didn’t seem like enough, so I stopped at a third shop to round it out. And after the Milk Bar, my taste buds definitely got a lot happier!

Enter L’Arte del Gelato. The milk bar is pretty close to the 9^th ave entrance so we decided to go all the way to the end of the market before landing on our next stop. It just so happened this place was the last stand and was very appealing, so we went for it. We got half dolce di latte and half vanilla bean (I know vanilla is not that exciting, but I figured if the vanilla was delicious, I could say with confidence that the rest of the flavors must be delicious as well!) This gelato was AMAZING. I can’t say it’s the best gelato in the city or anything nearly that bold only because I haven’t had much gelato in the city, or anywhere outside of my adventures in Firenze (averaging about 2.5 gelatos a day for the duration of my stay). But I can say that this gelato was damn good. Super creamy and flavorful…it definitely merits a second visit. Checkout their other locations too: Lincoln Center Plaza (in the summer months) and West Village (7th ave & Barrow st).

Onward! Our final stop was actually one of the first places we spied and I just couldn’t resist it. Eleni’s Bakery. It was so big and bright and colorful, I just couldn’t help but peer in the window. Also Eleni is a Greek name so I felt like I had to go in. Gotta support the brethren! (Or whatever the “sister” form of this word is. You get the point). Also I don't even know if Eleni is Greek...or a real person...I can't seem to find anything on her. Anyway, so it was an easy decision that this would be the third taste of the evening. The specialties appear to be sugar cookies and cupcakes, so we got one of each. To my fellow  Dukies, picture Mad Hatters cookies (my FAV Durham treat): fun, seasonally decorated simple cookies. Eleni’s was just perfect, exactly what I wanted. As for the cupcakes, she has a lot of vanilla and chocolate cupcakes with colorful buttercream frosting, red velvet, and some supercool, very appealing flavors like Oreo Madness and something (pictured over there <<<) topped with chopped walnuts, but the real star was the Pumpkin Cupcake!! IT WAS SO GOOD. Even hours later, which is actually when I ate it, the cake was super moist and, although I would have expected a cream cheese frosting, the vanilla buttercream was perfect. I usually try to stay away from buttercream because it is too sweet for me. It itches the roof of my mouth—another thing people tell me is weird, but it’s totally true! But anyway, this buttercream was really nice and fluffy and not too sweet. I’m in love. The pumpkin flavor is obviously seasonal so get out there and get your cupcake soon! Unfortunately Eleni’s only other spot is way up on 91^st street and Madison, but they do take large orders online and a lot of food stores (like Dean and Deluca, Zabar’s, Amish Market, etc.) sell her goodies. I’m sure I’ll be returning to the Chelsea Market soon enough and will certainly stock up on some of her yum cupcakes and cookies. It definitely feels more like they are made with love than those mass-produced cupcakes you find all around the city. And they are actually NORMAL sized cupcakes! In the age of giant Crumbs cupcakes and an obesity epidemic, it’s nice to have a cupcake that you can actually pick up with your hands...and that also happens to be delish. You've gotta try these!

I really urge you to make your way over to the Chelsea Market and try some of these treats for yourselves (except probably the milk and cookies) and explore some of the other great vendors/restaurants they have in there. The Green Table, a sustainable/organic/farm-to-table restaurant looked nice and yum. I will definitely be giving that one a try sometime soon…maybe with some gelato or a cupcake for dessert. :D Happy drooling!

- The Wandering New Yorker

Nigerian Independence Day

The Nigerian Independence Day celebration was a blast. It was definitely a scene. We caught the end of the parade, which included floats packed over capacity with dancing Nigerians...in addition to those dancing in the street. It was great! Huge turn out! I tried to take a pic to show how many people were there, but I just couldn’t get everyone. Here’s the best I could do. Everyone was decked in the country's colors: green and yellow or in more authentic garb. Who knew there were so many Nigerians in NYC? It's cool to think about how so many different countries celebrate their Independence Days in the city. And it's nice to partake in the multicultural events. I mean, if nothing else, there is always delicious ethnic food to be tasted. Onto that...  

Suya

Corn, plantains, whole fish!

As promised, I hit up the All Things Roasted vendor and had some seriously delicious chicken. I mean seriously...delicious. We must have really been enjoying ourselves, letting out mms and oos and licking our fingers, because a random girl, who had nothing to do with the food vendor, came up to us and asked "You like our chicken?" Hell yea I do. This particular chicken was brined overnight (no kidding around at this booth), grilled and seasoned with secret Nigerian spices. I tried to get more details, but no dice. I couldn’t even begin to guess what spices were in it, but it was definitely hot hot hot! After we devoured the chicken, we moved onto the suya…which earlier I described as West African shish kebab, but I’d say it’s closer to a satay. Really, though, it’s just suya! I mean meat on a stick has its own name in every culture, but it's not the fact that it's on a stick that makes it delicious, it's the meat that is delicious. So onto suya...this was sliced beef on a stick cooked on the grill as you can see in the pic, and again topped with those great spices. Somehow this was even hotter than the chicken, but so good! We took our suya to go (and finished it, I promise!) and walked around a bit more, checking out the cool tees and random circles of people dancing. It was a great vibe and a great time. 

Thanks to the All Things Roasted chefs for waking up my taste buds this Saturday! Any idea where we can get delicious Nigerian food in the city? Or do we have to wait til next year's festival? Hope not!

Craving that chicken...

- The Wandering New Yorker

Something to do this Saturday! One Day Only Street Festival

Nigerian Independence Day Street Festival

I want to make sure to write about things that everyone can go checkout for themselves after reading, but sometimes there are cool things going on only once a year and I don’t want to tell you about it after the fact…so here’s a pre-post on one of the things I’m doing this weekend: Nigerian Independence Day Street Festival!

Flag of Nigeria

I’ll be posting some more about it after the fact, but I wanted to let you know about it now so you can enjoy it as well.

Nigerian Independence Day is on October 1^st and celebrates the country’s independence from the United Kingdom in 1960. Doesn't it seem like every country has had to win their independence from the Brits at some point? Greedy! Anyway, woohoo for Nigeria!

In celebration, this Saturday October 9^th, there will be a parade and street festival.  Now I’m not a big parades girl, but if you are…the parade starts at 11am and will be on 2^nd ave from 54^th to 44^th streets. I am, however, a big street festival girl, so I will be hitting that up, at the Dag Hammarskjold Plaza (what?) on 47^th bet 1^st and 2^nd aves from 10am-6pm.  Since I am more than anything else, a big delicious-food-eating-girl, I will most likely be lingering around the “All Things Roasted” booth, where they’ll be selling some yummy Nigerian treats. Check out the flyer below (note: suya is a West African version of shish kebab. mm!).

Click to Enlarge

Of course I wouldn't let you go without some fun facts about the country (thanks to our friends at Wikipedia):

- Nigeria is located in West Africa, sharing its borders with the Republic of Benin on the west, Chad and Cameroon on the east, and Niger to the north

- Nigeria is the most populous country in Africa and the 8^th most populous country in the world

- Although the official language of Nigeria is English, there are over 500 documented languages spoken throughout the country (whoa!)

- For more fun facts, checkout the Facts Page of the Organization for the Advancement of Nigerians website

Alright so you'll know where I'll be. I'm super pumped because I don't really know what to expect, but I know there's going to be tons of food and clothing for sale and lots of entertainment. Maybe some dancing? (maybe I'll just be dancing, you don't wanna miss that!). Hope to see some of you there! More photos to come post-event. 

HAVE A GOOD WEEKEND

- The Wandering New Yorker 

Hands off my $25 shoes!: My Trip to Vintage Thrift

I was determined to make Vintage Thrift my next post. I tried to go on Thursday, then again on Friday, and finally succeeded on Sunday. The shop (@ 3^rd ave bet 22^nd and 23^rd) is actually a nonprofit, benefitting the United Jewish Council of the East Side, and that’s why they were closed Thurs. and Fri.--apparently it was Simchat Torah (not sure what that is, but it was marked on the calendar on the store’s door). So you’ve got to remember this when you are thinking of stopping by. Also they close at dusk on Fridays and are closed every Saturday for the Sabbath, plus all Jewish holidays. You can find the schedule on their website or get updates on their twitter page. Ok, just had to get that info out of the way.  Now onto the shop...

First Impressions: This really is a place to shop. It’s not a costume store like the thrift shops I’m used to in good old Durham (Thrift World anybody? Best place to find tailgate outfits!). It also isn’t one of those “vintage” shops where they seem to have forgotten that thrift shops generally discount couture items from their original prices. Vintage Thrift is just a great place to find fairly priced items that you want or need or don’t even know that you want or need! They sell (men’s and women’s) clothes, shoes, jewelry, kitchenware, paintings, books, music, random trinkets and who knows what else you’ll find if you look hard enough.

Part of the challenge is really keeping your eyes open, especially in this particular shop. It is a bit small and densely packed so it’s easy to miss something you might love if it’s surrounded by a bunch of old wicker baskets that you’re not really interested in. Keep an open mind and really fish through everything. It definitely took me a few rounds in the store before I made my great finds.

Some Highlights

L: 58th St, R: Central Park

Postcards: Perfect example. Right when you walk in there is a table with mostly (not very cute) shoes so I just walked past, but on my 3rd round I saw a box filled with old postcards, ranging from photos of foreign cities to famous artwork to random designs. Great decorative potential! I found two great photo postcards of Central Park and the 58th St Plaza (hello Apple store) in the 1800s. LOVE them. I really love old NYC pics. It’s kinda crazy to think that the city actually existed back then, with big-ish buildings, but also horse-drawn carriages (that weren’t surrounded by protestors holding signs of dead horses). Anyway, this box is packed tight tight so you really have to commit yourself to looking through it. I was at it for about a half hour before I just had to stop. I prob would have stuck it out a bit longer had I not been bent over at a 90 degree angle, with my ass actually being the first thing people were seeing when they walked into the store. Not for sale.

Check the full album for more pics!

Shoes: While I was entranced by postcard sifting, some girl actually tried to nab my Stuart Weitzmans and I had to fend her off. She was definitely disappointed/scared of me, but I wasn’t about to let these go…look at how cute they are! 25 dollars friends. All mine :)

I’m pretty sure they are going to kill my feet (prob cuz they are a half size too small, but I mean..leather stretches right?) I just won't wear them dancing. And if they don’t work out I’ll pass them off to one of my deserving friends. Who’s a size 8? Get in line, ladies.

This is definitely one of the larger thrift shop shoe selections that I’ve seen.  No name stuff, along with Jimmy Choos and Manolos, etc.  Mostly small sizes, though, like 7’s boooo. This is common for thrift stores and I never understood why. Are women’s feet getting bigger as time has gone on? I looked it up. According to one article, women’s feet are growing and apparently it’s tied to the obesity epidemic slash the fact that we are taller and bigger people in general. And apparently eating pizza and other “high-density processed foods” when you are in puberty makes your feet grow larger. I don’t really get it, but I mean…I definitely ate lots of pizza and have kind of big feet. Well worth it if you ask me!

Trinkets: This store is a great place to find fun decorative pieces or trinkets. I’m always looking for unique little things that might be cool to give as gifts (recently as Xmas gifts) and I found something great for my dad. The backstory on this gift is not worth recounting, but it involves my dad getting too excited by little opera glasses and binoculars at the US Open. Clearly it stuck with me because when I saw these old binoculars, they instantly reminded me of him and I thought they’d look great on the mantle in his office aka his man cave. Semi-retired men love decorating their offices with random crap (I mean treasures). :D So dad I guess now you know what you’re getting for Christmas, but I couldn’t sacrifice the post for the sake of surprise. And more importantly, remember when I was going into 6^th grade and you and the mother bought me a Nintendo 64 for my birthday (AUGUST) and wouldn’t let me have it until Christmas (DECEMBER) for actually no good reason at all? Well here’s your payback. Feel my pain! Check them out.

I looked up the name on the binoculars case and actually found some interesting stuff. Jeff Ehrlich founded an “optical goods, cutlery and jewelry” shop at 3 Astor House around 1863. I guess the business was passed down to his sons and they renamed it. There was a bit more, but basically my research tells me these are pretty old. Nice. Merry Christmas Ba!

Jewelry and Clothing: Definitely hit or miss and for sure requires some digging. I was actually trying to look at more clothing but there was this older man who was searching the dresses section while carrying around some purple velvet pants and I was just so confused I couldn’t focus. I’m gonna say he was shopping for his wife. Or maybe he’s actually that guy from the UES who jogs in women’s lingerie. I love this city. Also what is with the sexually ambiguous people I keep running into on these adventures?

Anyway, that’s that. Definitely worth checking out and also somewhere I plan to return. I meant to ask how often they get new items, but my guess is it’s just as often as people bring stuff in. I’m thinking to separate visits by a month at a time. Although if you wanna check it out and need a friend I’d be happy to return sooner! Happy thrifting!

Look out for the cool window displays.
All pieces are up for silent auction

- The Wandering New Yorker

A "Tail" of Two Lobster Rolls: Red Hook vs. Luke's Lobster Roll-Off

This post focuses on one of my great loves: food. I knew I wanted to write about something delicious, but wanted it to be more than just a restaurant review, so to spice things up I had a little competition. Since this summer has been all about the lobster rolls in NYC I thought I would revisit a fav of mine and try out a new spot that I’ve read a lot about. And so the Luke’s Lobster vs. Red Hook Lobster Pound “Lobster Roll-Off” was conceived.

Red Hook Lobster Pound is located in Red Hook, Brooklyn and Luke’s is in the East Village (they also have a UES location that I haven’t been to yet). Each makes its lobster rolls a bit differently, the former with paprika and scallions (@ $15 w/ chips) and the latter with some “secret spices” (@ $16 w/ chips & drink), but one thing that is consistent with both is that the lobsters, as well as the owners, are shipped in fresh from Maine (well the RH owners’ family is from Maine, but it counts!). 

Geography Lesson: Red Hook is in NW Brooklyn, very close to the FiDi (see map). Some fun facts: the area is named for the red clay soil (that I’m assuming is somewhere?) and the point of land projecting into the East River. Get it? Looks like a hook? It is also the only part of NYC that has a frontal view of the Statue of Liberty, since it looks toward France. Good to know.

So the first stop of the day was Red Hook Lobster (actually the first stop was Ikea, where I learned that they no longer have ball pits in the day care area. Very upsetting. Did anyone else spend most of their childhood in the Ikea ball pit? Cuz I did. And it rocked.) Had I not gone to Ikea first, I would have taken the F down to Red Hook. That’s really the best way to get there except for the water taxi, which works also, but first you have to get over to the pier, so it’s your choice. Either way it’s a 20 min walk from wherever you get off to RH Lobster. Basically the location of this place is, to put it kindly, in the BOONIES. It’s not so much the walk that sucked, but that it was a walk through an area that showed little sign of life, minus some overfed squirrels (must be all that organic and free-range food scraps they get to eat). The whole place was just eerie. It reminded me of one of those intro scenes in a sci-fi movie where you don’t know what’s wrong, but you know there’s something, most likely aliens, because it’s just a little TOO quiet. Very Andromeda Strain-esque…

Anyway…Red Hook Lobster. We walked in just in time for some lobster fishing! They’ve got two big tanks of live lobsters in the store front, which I thought was really cool. And they have a giant lobster-themed room next door with picnic tables so you can sit and enjoy your roll. Check out the pics in the slideshow to get the full effect of the décor. I definitely enjoyed the lobster roll, but I think the general creepiness of the whole experience put a damper on it.  Here’s my summary.

What I liked: 1) Live lobster tanks…this lobster is really fresh! 2) Seating area w/ fun decorations to look at while you munch and plenty of space to sit. 3) RH’s lobster rolls are garnished with chopped scallions. Scallions add great flavor and provide a nice little crunch, which I really loved.

What I didn’t like: 1) The area was just too creepytown for me, the street we were on was the only place that had any action: a laundromat and a dive bar. 2) Way too hard to get to, it seems like everyone around there must drive? Luckily there are some other spots where you can find these rolls, like the Brooklyn Flea and Brooklyn Ice Cream Factory. 3) RH’s lobster rolls are covered in paprika, a spice that I like, but not nearly that much of it right on top of my food.  It was just a little too much and took away from the actual lobster flavor.

DETOUR! Post lobster roll #1 we had to make a pit stop, but RH Lobster had no bathrooms so we went to the bar down the block. It was a bit of a lucky sidestep because I discovered this great Japanese beer called Hitachino Nest White Ale.  It is light, with a bit of citrus, but nothing as strong as corona or blue moon (I’m really not a fan of those). Perfect for a hot afternoon. This was a charming little spot, but I realized it was time to go once my personal space was invaded by a man carrying around an infant and his giant friend who had waist-length dreadlocks that kept grazing my leg. Gross. Onward. 

The fun didn’t stop once we made it to the subway, tho. We were really confused down there, which was us being tired and stupid, but there really wasn’t much signage on the platform! Luckily a, I’m gonna say transsexual, who was not an MTA-worker and was lingering around the station, guided us to where we needed to be. Thanks ma’am/man! Then the train wasn’t running on its normal line which confused us again. Fab. Red Hook just really does not want me to come back. 

Once we finally made it to Luke’s Lobster all was right in the world. The neighborhood was booming with people and there wasn’t too long of a line in the shop. We got our roll and walked over to the park to sit and eat outside. Now although I am clearly a Luke’s fan, I’m going to try to muster up some pros as well as cons. Onto those…

What I like: 1) The lobster! There’s just something about it…maybe they just keep it really cold, but whenever I bite into it I think to myself “this tastes so fresh!” It can really stand alone. 2) The bread was a perfect balance of crispy and soft. Way to go! 3) Luke’s uses these great roll holders that are open on one end so you can cleanly munch away. Anyone who knows me knows I don’t like getting food all over my hands. 4) It’s in a great location. Walking distance from my apt (~25 blocks), close to public transport, surrounded by other great spots.

What I don’t like: 1) No seating!! The space is pretty tiny, with minimal seating, and when you’re waiting for your order you generally get crammed in the corner by the chips, where you are inevitably in some chip-chooser’s way. BUT, there is a great park just one block away on 7^th bet Ave A and B and it provides a perfect outdoor lobster roll-enjoying environment…plus, real estate in NY is expensive, so I won’t hold it against you Luke’s. J 2) Although the UES location delivers, the EV location doesn’t! What’s up with that? We need our lobster fill down here too. I hope that’s soon to come.

The fact is, both of these lobster rolls were delicious, but the win for me would have to be Luke’s. It’s not just about the lobster, it’s about the experience too! 

Mmmmm all done!